Have you ever stopped to think: "My life would be so much better if only..."
Jim Rohn, an American entrepreneur and master of personal development once said: “Don’t wish it was easier… wish you were better!”
Of the people that I meet day to day, on average about 30%-40% of them have heard about life coaching. Of this group of people who have heard about coaching, maybe half actually have a firm understanding of what great coaching really represents. My goal today writing this blog is to explain, as best as I can, what coaching really can be.
Each of us is wired to believe certain things from a young age. In essence we create a model of the world as we see it. These beliefs are often moulded before you even turn 10 years old. We have beliefs associated with how the world works and how it should work. These are “truths” in so far as each of us perceives them. The problem with these certainties that we have is that they could be flawed. We generally don’t notice these misconceptions because we don’t question them (...a great coach knows how to use the right questions to bring this out). For a better and much deeper understanding of how our beliefs create our reality check out this video by an author and expert on the subject, Deepak Chopra, here.
These beliefs that we hold for true are often preventing us from living the lives that we desire.
Take for instance someone who struggles to make friends. This person may live in a world where they believe that:
· New encounters are ALWAYS awkward
· No one ever speaks to them
· People are so individualistic
· New friends are hard to come by
How would this person’s life be radically different if instead this same person believed:
· New encounters are exciting, you never know what to expect!
· Speaking to strangers is amazing because you get to find out about people’s life stories
· Everyone seems to want to get in touch with me
· People are so sociable – humans are such social creatures
· Making new friends is so easy
So at this point in the blog you are probably thinking: “So what you’re trying to tell me is that I am supposed to lie to myself about the reality of the situation?” This is obviously NOT what I am advocating. What this scenario does bring up are questions like:
· What is the truth?
· What is the real reality?
· What is the world really like?
If this person were to change their perspective and DECIDE to believe in an alternate reality, a more positive and conducive one towards their goal of making friends, how would this change the nature of the game?
Have you ever felt like you needed to sort out any of the following areas of your life whether it was:
· And more…
You knew that your life would be better if you would just.. if you could just.. if things were just… “easier”.
Well this is where the coach steps into the picture. As a life coach and someone who has a coach, I have come to imagine the different areas of life as a set of pillars. Each one of these reaches up towards the sky.. a 0 would represent a non-existent part of your life and a height of 10 would be a perfect score (maximum happiness in this sector of your life). These pillars all have a different height. The height of each pillar directly relates to how you feel about that specific aspect of your life. Many coaches will provide you a "Wheel of Life" to fill out during an initial coaching session. This essentially provides you and the coach a simplified snapshot of what your life currently looks like.
This is why coaching exists. As a coach, you observe people's reality, you ask questions and you determine what is impeding them from achieving their goals. Most people assume that they need better circumstances, resources, or a better network in order to achieve their goal. When in fact, generally, the reason we aren't achieving what we look to accomplish is related to psychological blocks. There is nothing particularly special about a life coach. We just spend our time analysing and evaluating human behaviour. The result being that eventually we become very aware of existing human patterns and we are able get through to our clients based on proven techniques that have helped us empower previous clients. We then support our clients throughout the whole process of reinventing themselves from a place of power.
If it helps, you could even draw a parellel between coaches and engineers. Engineers use and leverage the concepts and theories devised by scientists to help build transport systems, bridges, and buildings, among other things. Coaches use elements of psychology to understand people and then use practical and repeatable methods to help them advance their lives and acheive their goals.
I hope this has helped explain in more detail what coaches mean when they say “coaching unlocks your potential”. What are you waiting for to try it out? I guarantee that if you book yourself into a free consulation with a skilled coach it is an experience you will not regret (nor proabably forget). And if you still aren't completely convinced, then hopefully Bill gates of Microsoft and Eric Schmidt of Google can hopefully help tip the scale in this short YouTube video.
Get in touch,
Mobile: (+44) 07476975583